Savior
by Sore Ga Ai Deshou
Summary: It was because of him why I became so depressed. It was his fault why I fell so hard. It was because of him why I resorted to these drastic measures. Because of him I had to alleviate the pain any way I knew how.


Title: So This Is Love

Author: Panduhhsoup

Genre: Angst/Romance

Word count: 1,848

Rating: K

Warnings: No blood, just a bit emo. Mention of cutting, but none executed. Sesshoumaru and Kagome slightly OOC, as well.

AU/Canon: AU

Theme: #87 – Blood

Kagome stared out the window of an artistically designed house. The birds sang their song joyfully, filling the air with a melodious tune. A small smile made it's way unto her face. Looking down, she pulled up her kimono sleeve and traced along the lines of the scar. It went all the way down to her mid-forearm. She frowned and looked back up and out the window, a wistful look gracing her features. "I owe him my life."

_It was because of him why I became so depressed. It was his fault why I fell so hard. It was because of him why I resorted to these drastic measures. Because of him I had to alleviate the pain any way I knew how. Even if the measures went too far- the end justified the means. _

_The rain poured relentlessly, not leaving a single spot dry on the unyielding earth. Maybe after this downpour, the dirt would be flexible enough to allow the birth of a new flower for the season. "Maybe" is such an ambiguous word. It's of the words that always allowed a person to harbor faith and hope in their hearts. It was the wind under the wings of a bird; the support it needed to fly. However, if the wind were gone, the bird would fall unto the hard cold ground, into a dark abyss of an unconscious recluse; the vice it needed to escape the inexplicable pain that would come soon after._

_The thunder in the sky roared its anger at the events of the day; especially because of the one at hand. It was as if it were scolding me for my decision. Albeit, a small part of me wanted to stop, wanted to just deal with everything and hope for the best, the greater, more grim, part of me just wanted it all to end now. However, even if the thunder and forces of nature deemed it a fallacious act, I had to. _

_I just had to._

_I'm not strong enough to endure._

_To survive._

_To live on._

_"I just can't take the mind-numbing pain anymore." I screamed to the heavens, my voice becoming hoarse, as my tears mixed with the falling rain. Giving the illusion I wasn't crying. However, my red, puffy eyes betrayed it and gave off that very look of pure sadness. "If Inuyasha hadn't just degraded me to less than bacterial wastes, then I wouldn't have been here. Then, he left me for the cold corpse that once was a woman, now a cursed clod of dirt in a faulty shell."_

_Inhaling a large bit of air, filling my lungs with oxygen, I prepared myself for the pain that would be my vice; just as the unconsciousness was for the dying bird. A finely carved knife was held in my grasp and it lightly traced my porcelain skin. My obsidian hair was plastered to my face and I didn't bother to move it out of my eyes. Wherever the knife cut into the flesh and traced down was its business. It didn't matter, as long as it did the job. I never once noticed the golden predatory gaze that was set on me, from inside of the bushes and trees._

_I clamped my teeth down and screamed once more pressing the knife to my skin, trying the block out the sounds of ripping flesh. I thought that once you were to cut your skin, you'd feel pain. But the pain never came. Why? Did I do something wrong?_

_Again…?_

_I opened my eyes slowly, only to meet the gaze of another with beautiful pools of molten gold as eyes. I took a sharp intake of breath, 'Sesshoumaru.' "Se-Seshoumaru… What are you doing… Why are you here…?"_

_He remained silent and kept my stare locked with his own. He searched my eyes for my soul, reading everything and me like a book. I tried to look away, but he wouldn't allow me. I wouldn't allow myself. If the beauty in his eyes were the last things I'd see before I'd die, then I'd embrace it for as long as possible._

_Wait… Why didn't I die…? Or at least feel as if I was slipping from consciousness…? I felt his larger, rougher hands on my own. He stopped me… He… Saved me. Impossible! He would never save anyone. He was just here to kill me himself, to make the job easier for me!_

_My eyes must have just spelled out confusion in them, because he caressed my cheek in a calming manner. I leaned into his touch and exhaled my held breath. The feel of his hands on me… It just felt… right._

_'I wonder if this is how Kikyou feels when Inuyasha embraces her.' I thought mildly._

_I opened my eyes to meet his again and I voice a word to sum up all of my confusing thoughts. "Why…?"_

_He never answered me… until a few moments of silence passed between us. "Because you have a large bout of latency in you. You could be, Miko, something great. And yet, you let my low-life of a brother, push you into a sinkhole of depression. Why is that?" Sesshoumaru opened my palm and withdrew the knife from my hand as he spoke to me. I never noticed, as I was too indulged in listening to waves of baritone pass my ears. He spoke with a silver tongue- a deliciously mesmerizing silver tongue._

_"I love him."_

_"Oh? The miko I know would never let a foolish male keep her down, even if she loved him. She was a strong woman, capable of standing on her own two feet. And would risk her life to see that others were happy. However, she would never dislodge herself from reality to escape the minor pain that she felt now. Instead, she would try to make the best of the situation, no matter how minor, or major, it was. An optimist, to say the least."_

_I listened to him, still leaning against his hand, somehow moving closer to him and farther away from the tree that she leaned against. "Sesshoumaru…" My eyes closed and I dropped my hands to my sides, allowing my skin to be sullied by the moist earth._

_"Why are you letting him get to you like this? He has done nothing but harm and hinder you. He led you on and into the carefully hidden trap. You are smarter than most, but allowed love to blind your senses." He looked down at the quiet girl in front of him. A small smile prodded at his lips but he resisted the urge to let it show. She was beautiful. A raven-haired beauty sent from the Gods above to grace him with the ability to see her. She was like none other. He was like none other. And together, they would be perfect together- the yin to his yang, to balance each other out. _

_He wanted her; and he wanted her bad. He had to have her. He would have her. His beast, nor himself, could except any excuses. _

"_What do you plan on doing, miko? Ending your life so disgracefully, or living on to be better than what his expectations were. This Sesshoumaru would be most displeased if you chose the earlier option. And you'd be thought of as lower than what Inuyasha thinks of you." He allowed her small frame to press against him, she dirtied his clothes but he could take it, as long as she was in his embrace. Quietly his inhaled her scent, as faint as it was because of the rain, and a deep rumble erupted in his chest._

_My breathing slowed as I heard him purr. 'Haha. To think I'd see the day when Sesshoumaru purred.' My head nuzzled deeper into his body, prodding for warmth, which I so easily received. "Sesshoumaru… Why are you doing this for me…?"_

_"It's because you need the help. If you wish not for my services, then I shall set off and leave you here to your own devices." Sesshoumaru hoped it was not the case, this was the closer he'd ever gotten to her._

_"No, no," I quickly sat up. "I didn't mean to offend you… I just… You've never been so nice to me before… And you've always been so aloof around the others and me. I just never thought you'd care." I fumbled over my words trying to find the right words. But all thought processes stopped when I felt lips press against my own. His lips were so soft and I couldn't help but melt against him. I closed his eyes and pressed into his kiss instinctively. My arms draped themselves over his shoulders as he wrapped an arm around my waist. When he pulled away, my face was flushed and I looked down. I never expected this._

_It was wonderful._

_Sesshoumaru couldn't help but allow a small smirk to etch its way onto his face. It was better than he thought it'd be. Her lips felt like clouds and she tasted sweeter than any fruit. _

_He'd remember it forever._

_"Take me home…?" I called out timidly after a few moments of comfortable silence. I didn't think that it was to be said, that I actually meant his place of residence. I didn't have to either, for he did just that. I trusted him. Something I did too easily, but my gut told me that it wouldn't be in vain. I smiled… A real smile- something that I haven't been doing in a while._

_Sesshoumaru growled in agreement as he picked up bridal style, and headed off to the Western Lands. "Very well."_

Kagome smiled a big smile at the memory and turned her head in the direction of the door being opened. It was Sesshoumaru, carrying in a big piece of cleaned venison. Standing up, Kagome walked over to Sesshoumaru, bowing her head a bit. "Welcome home, my love." She said, her eyes bright with adoration.

Sesshoumaru dropped the meat unto the floor and lowered his head to place a loving kiss on her lips. "Dinner. I'm going to go and get cleaned up." With a turn on the balls of his heel he was out the door and heading to the Hot Springs.

Kagome nodded and looked to the young deer. "I guess I should get started on cooking." She said with slight exasperation, before setting off to work.

Here she was, cooking in her own home, for her husband. A few years from now, she would have never anticipated this event. She predicted her own death, only to be outsmarted by Sesshoumaru. And for that, she loved and owed him her life. If it weren't for her knight in shining armor, she'd have been dead. He was her rock, her husband and her mate. Glancing at the crescent moon that adorned her shoulder quickly, she grinned. Death would come to her, no time soon.

And most importantly- He was her Savior and never would she forget it for as long as she lived.


End file.
